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30 Seconds to Air | Tuesday, December 11, 2007 | 1:26 PM

30 Seconds To Air


Every day, right before her show starts, Ellen listens to the studio audience as intently as a doctor listens to a stethoscope. She listens for their pulse, their energy, their state of mind. Her ears are so finely tuned, she can hear a pin drop ...okay, so it's a bowling pin, the point is that Ellen listens to the audience as much as she listens to her guests. Because they are both equally important. And as she patiently listens, she hears a small individual voice in the distance. "Miss DeGeneres ...It's 30 Seconds To Air.

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Just saw you with George Clooney and wondered why you didn't give him any of you Ellen Wear?
I think you should pul him some on his antinna of his car. HA! HA!
New joke: What do you get when you cross a Hummer with a VW Bug? A HUMMBUG
Here's a saying on a mug a friend made up for me, it says, Relax, there's a woman on the job!
I received this while working for an oil company years ago because I use to say this everytime I would work for this one company.
Love your show,
Yours, Jeanenne Dunbar

Posted by Jeanenne Dunbar | January 19, 2009 4:15 PM

Hi Ellen,

I saw Emily Baird, the six-year old composer on your show, and I tried to find a CD of her music. Does she have a CD out? I'm not even sure how to spell her name.

Becky Simpson

Posted by Becky Simpson | January 9, 2008 1:03 PM

ELLEN!!!


I like the posts!!! Very funny!

btw... I like the episode with the bowling alley. I have my own bowling ball... its blue!!! I had it sized to fit. Bowling ball, bag, shoes, and custome fitted all for 99 dollars. What a deal!!! Plus I got a few pointers on how to release! You know you have to hear a pop when your thumb comes out.. that's a good thing.. a good pop!... Lolli pop.(Shirley Temple! in my head now)

Oh geeze!

Nite,
T

Posted by tonya | December 31, 2007 7:17 PM

Good morning Ellen, I was just checking to see the winners list for the 12 days giveaway to tell them all CONGRATULATIONS........ anyway I guess if it is alright with you, you can do it for me. I hope you have a very Happy New Years and a great birthday bash.

Here's to you
Alberta

Posted by Alberta Trueluck-Hardin | December 27, 2007 6:09 AM

Hi Ellen,
Happened across your site BY Luck,but Im so glad I did. I lost so much this last year but one thing that gives me a lot of joy and laughts is your program. You are really a god given gift to people how could really use an hour of just ellen,no out side bothers.
Thank you for sharing your gift of funny to all who watch.
I love all the animals you bring to the show.
Thank You Ellen. Its good to smile and laugh at least once a day
Your TV viewing Dearist Friend
Carla

Posted by Carla Savoca | December 20, 2007 10:27 AM

ELLEN, MY NAME IS NINA I WOULD LIKE TO THANK YOU FOR BEING YOU!!!!!!!! I'M NOT THE GREATEST ON THE COMPUTER,NOR THE GREATEST SPELLER!! I JUST WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW HOW MUCH YOU HELP ME EVERYRI DAY. ALL THOUGH I WOULD LOVE TO SEE,OR MET YOU.I AM DOING THIS FOR MY MOTHER!!! IN 2006, SHE LOST HER MOTHER :LITTLE GRANDMA: AND SADLY, 7 MONTHS LATER SHE LOST THE LOVE OF HER LIFE. I THINK SHE COULD USE A LITTLE PICK ME UP!!

SO ELLEN IF YOU CAN PLEASE PICK HER,, AND THE REST OF THIS FAMILY UP.....

A DEAR DEAR DEAR FRIEND
NINA KAY

Posted by NINA KAY | December 13, 2007 6:01 AM

down here in the sticks we would love to win one of ellens 12 days my10 year old keeps checking but it has not happened yet we have tried now for two years. thank you merry christmas from kentucky ken,lisa zachary 13 and mollie elizabeth we love you ellen your the best

Posted by lisa gillespie | December 13, 2007 5:32 AM

Last year at this time my husband was home due to having gall bladder surgury. When you did the crank phone call to people who wrote in, he thought that was the funniest part of your show. My husband is CFO at a hospital. If you ever do these crank calls again I wish you would call him as a person who is charged for somthing so unbelievable ( like having a leg or arm removed, or breast implants that are to large(somthing they don't even do). Or in March call him about NCAA basketball. We've been married 40 years and that is what he did on our wedding night(watched the NCAA games. Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Kitty Montgomery

Posted by Elenia Montgomery | December 13, 2007 5:28 AM

re:Day 5 of Ellen's 12 Days Of Giveaways is a gizmo lover's dream come true.

I thought this was a funny line cuz my dog's(a white westie)name is "Gizmo"!!
Ellen, you are crazy funny and you rock!! Keep it up. Happy Birthday and Happy Holidays!!
=)

Posted by Tracey | December 12, 2007 9:21 PM

Hi Ellen, I love you and the show been watching it every since it started, Keep up the good work bye>>>>

Posted by Delores rushing | December 12, 2007 8:57 PM

Dear Ellen I wach your show everyday it brings me sunshine , I think your so wounderfull .I know you do alot for people so I want to ask if you could say hellow to my son SGT lEON WELTON WARD WHO IS IN A WAR SONE AND FAR AWAY FROM ALL HIS FAMILY THIS XMAS . i KNOW YOU THINK OF OUR TROOPS . i WISH YOU A VARY HAPPY CHRISTMAS . BEST WISHES JANET WARD .XX

Posted by JANETWARD | December 12, 2007 8:04 PM

Dear Ellen, I have tried to write you many times and could not ever get thru. How about eight days of chanukah. Love your show and find it very intertaining. I am a handi-cap senior who would love to come to your show but it is hard for me to come. You do so much to help the needy I am proud 0f you. So many entertainers pocket the money and through it away for stupid things. Merry Christmas. Vivian Bagatelle

Posted by Vivian Bagatelle | December 12, 2007 7:01 PM

It is 9:40 pm Weds. 12/12/07 and I just shut off Oprah and I probably will not see any more of your shows either. I know it is good for your ratings,as it is for Oprah; but I have trouble watching you gals giving away all those expensive gifts to people that look like they can well afford to buy thier own.
I am a depression kid that got nothing free in my life. I am a combat-wounded veteran and put my life on the line in two wars for this great country. Now it seems like the american is dipicted as a country of free loaders.

I know you do a lot of good; but how about doing more for the unfortunate kids and disabled veterans,in lieu of the greedy.

We of the depression years have had to fight for everything we have. Hopefully, with the grace of God, we will never have to be subjected to that sort of life ever again.

I am a proud AMERICAN,a WWII Navy veteran and kamikazze survivor. Good luck in your future endeavors.

Posted by Frank Boffi | December 12, 2007 6:53 PM

Hello Ellen,
I would like to start off by saying how great I think you are, you have such compassion for children,animals (d0gs) and young people who have
talent. My family is going through a lot right now (one of those bad times in life) and I can honestly say we watch you everyday together and have a laugh. My children are 12 yr old twins,20
year old son and a 25 yr old son and when you put a show on like you did today with the next Johnny Cash, we can really sit and feel. I try to teach
my children that there is always hope. If you ever come to Toronto, Ont. pls give me a heads up so I can purchase tickets and give my family some happiness, which they truly deserve.
Thank you for being you, and we think your mother is adorable. That is part of our sadness, we lost
our little "mama" a couple of years ago and still are recovering. Thank you very much for making us laugh. We hope you and all your loved ones have a very nice holiday Ellen.

Janice

Posted by Anonymous | December 12, 2007 6:37 PM

Hi Ellen! I wish you and all your staff & family, a very Happy Holidays! I wanted to thank you for putting the songs and who is singing them by your Ellen Logo! I used to wonder who they were, and what song, but never knew them, most of the time! Now I don't have to wonder anymore! Also, I was wondering if we'll ever get to meet Gladys? She is SO hysterical, and seems to be a wonderful person! Wouldn't it be nice if we all could have either a neighbor, or a relative as crazy (funny) kind of crazy, I mean as she is? Lastly, but not the least, I want to tell you how much I love you, and your kind and generous heart. I hope someday my husband and I could meet you, (he loves you too)and I could just give you a warm and long hug, just because you so deserve everything wonderful that comes your way. Your 'Momma' must've done a great job on you, because you are such a very special person, with the biggest heart ever! You just show us the real & human side of your life, (I bawled my eyes out right along with you, when you were telling the story about your dog that you got for your friend at work. I really felt your pain! (We HAD 5 doxies - all adopted, and now only three are left.) I know you'll probably never read this because it's probably too long, but, I don't care, there is just SO many wonderful things to say about you! God Love you & much happiness! Judie Kaczoroski, Riverside, CA

Posted by Judie | December 12, 2007 5:54 PM

Hi Ellen!! I think that for your 50th Birthday, you should celebrate it in a town in NY that was named for YOU. It is the town of Ellenville. Ellenville is located in Ulster County (nestled in the Catskill Mountains), approximately 100 miles north of NYC. As of 2006, Ellenville had a population estimated at 3,926 (sorry, I couldn't find the 2007 report). The Catskills are known for their lavish resorts that brought in big name entertainment for many years. I wish I lived in Ellenville so that I could personally invite you to shoot a segment of "Wish You Were Here". But, if you decide to visit this town which carries your namesake, I'd be glad to meet you up there. I would just love to be a part of your 50th Birthday Celebration! You bring so much laughter into my life on a daily basis.

Dance on, girlfriend, Dance on!!

Renee Marchak
Monroe, NY

Posted by Renee | December 12, 2007 5:54 PM

Hello Ellen,
Try using you "Waaaaaaaaaaaaa" word to Jingle Bells. It's a hoot. Just for fun.
Happy Holidays
C M Allen

P S: You are a gem. Laughter makes this old world turn a little better.

Posted by C M Allen | December 12, 2007 2:57 PM

Hey ELLEN!! Merry Christmas from ALASKA!!
We love your show and I watch it EVERY SINGLE DAY...What I want to know, is how do us Alaskans get tickets to your show?? I have tried in the past, but never get a call.

I too, just turned 50 and what a WONDERFUL AGE!!
I would love to get tickets to your show in 2008...we would love to come for your 12 days of Christmas if possible. But as you know we have to make airline reservations and need time ahead to plan, as we don't live in California.
Thanks for making us smile and laugh everyday.
Hope to hear from you or staff on how we can obtain tickets.. Sincerely, Mary Anne & Dan

Posted by Mary Anne | December 12, 2007 1:22 PM

Dearest Ellen,

Just a quick note to say... I think the writers strike might be a good thing for your show. I have laughed everyday. Keep the funny coming :)

Love you, Pauline

Posted by Pauline | December 12, 2007 12:38 PM

Ellen,
I secretly watch you at work every day and I luv your show. Sometimes I actually work when I'm watching so I should get a raise! :) Thanks for being so uplifting. Love that Striker!

Mandy
Baltimore

Posted by Mandy | December 12, 2007 12:32 PM

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